To the parent watching their kid get released

If your child has just been released, or is struggling in the game, this one's for you , because you're going through something too, and hardly anyone talks about that.

You can't play the game for them. And this is one of those things you can't fix, no matter how much you want to. When I was released, the people who loved me could see something was wrong, and they felt completely powerless to reach me. I know now how hard that must have been to watch.

So here's what I've learned about what actually helps.

Firstly, don't rush to fix it. When a young player gets released, the instinct is to jump straight to solutions: the next club, the next trial, the plan. But often what they need first is just to be allowed to feel gutted about it, without it being turned into a problem to solve. Sit with them in it before you try to sort it.

Secondly, watch out for the quiet. When a normally confident kid goes flat and stops talking, that's usually when they need someone most, and it's exactly when they'll insist they're fine. You don't have to have the perfect words. Just keep the door open.

Thirdly, you don't have to be the one with the answers. Sometimes the most powerful thing is getting them in front of someone who's been exactly where they are - someone they can be honest with in a way they can't always be with a parent. That's not a failure on your part. That's you doing the most important thing you can do: making sure they're not going through it alone. You won’t be able to fully understand what your son or daughter is experiencing. My Dad had a career in football from playing semi pro, to coaching England schoolboys u16 for years and even he couldn’t fully relate to me. It’s normal. Beyond The Pitch do understand and we’re here to work alongside you.

You know your child better than anyone. My job is to be the person in their corner who's walked the path they're on.

One thing is for sure, my parents would have love to have had Beyond The Pitch when I was 18